C'mon, you know rtil secretly wants this to happen so badly.

Who wants to field the challenge?

edit: Woop! Top 5,000 in Blam/Protects! ... Only so long to go!

Howdy y'all.

I just thought I'd add a new non-rant news post. I haven't been keeping my NG Account well. For having joined 7 years ago, I should be a level-billion mofo with that giant purple dildo from GTASA as my user weapon.

I haven't been reviewing much either. I've decided that I'll review 1-2 submissions a day, and start commenting actual user pages if I think someone did a really good job. That's probably my favorite part about the new user page system.

Most of my time this summer is being spent at one of my two jobs, or playing the Eastern Sun mod for Diablo II. It pretty much makes the game unforgiving in Hell difficulty, but gives you so many badass new items and the ability to trick yourself out. My two big chars are a level 90 Paladin named Ezekiel, and a level 52 Zon named Hashinka.

Right now my Pally is specced as a summoner. I summon two Holy Bears with like 5000 life and 6000 damage, and I get an Asn Shadow Master from my runeworded scepter. To help them out, I have a single point into Annihilation (which becomes level 25) and is maxed at 63% crushing blow and adds in some ias. I have a billion points into Zeal, Vengeance, and Sac, which all synergize, and a point into Hypno Blast, which has become a lifesaver in cow levels. It AoE converts and damages and I pretty much spam it for free with no casting delay. I do about 4k-8k, but my ias on Zeal is aboot 140, and I have a 93% CB. My merc is an Act 3 Ice dood named Scorch. I know, I know... Barbs or Aura dudes are better, but I love Scorch so. We've had good times.

My Zon at the moment is specced pretty plain. Jab/Lightning Fury. Coasting through Nightmare.

The item customization is insane, though. You can add stats in several different ways, and all the new runewords are easier and better than the originals. I mean, check out this fucking scepter... I think I added (on top of the runeword) Max Life %, Life Leech, and Attack Rating % Bonus... then I tinkered in small bits of elemental/magic damage for the hell of it.

The Clocks.
The Locks.
The Uzis.
The Star Syndicate.
The Kitty Krew.

I don't care to list any more.

They exist solely to pump terrible blam fodder into the portal and then pass it. They make awful submissions in a matter of minutes and throw them right up on the portal with a big, "VOTE 5 LOLOLOLLOLOL GOATSE," and they seem to actually get that five. It's ridiculous, and it's annoying.

I've been a member for years-- I actually fought it when the Clocks started up. I'd bring the pain and dish out the zeroes. But now? The protection points are too good to pass up, so I pass every single shitty flash by a user from one of the user groups because I know it'll pass whether I vote 0 or not.

Did you all know the user with the most flash submissions is TheStarSyndacite with something like 407? That's ridiculous. It's bullshit.

I stopped voting and reviewing for years-- I would just watch the flashes and play the games and enjoy Newgrounds, but now, I put in my 10 EXP per day and vote on a bunch of portal entries. Why? Because I want to get it to the point where my soul-crushing Supreme Commander Level 60 Deity Whistle fucking vote can BLAM one of their shitty submissions instantly. I realize that day will never actually come, but there's no use in not trying.

I know each group has some members that actually make worthwile contributions, but by far and large these user groups are a plague, which begs the question:

Why are there no positive user groups?

That's it.